settled.

I can't help but laugh as I read my last entry about finding Vermont people all the way out here in California.

Last week, our friend Emily was in town visiting her brother and we all met up in the city and had fun.

Tonight, Nick and I are having dinner with one of his dear friends from Albany who also went to UVM. She is visiting their high school friend Jenny who Nick never would have known was here until he walked out of work and she happened to drive by right at that second. Turns out she lives ten minutes away from us.

Tomorrow, Bryan visits for the week before another ridiculously large group of UVM people fly out here from Burlington, Chicago, Boulder, Portland, and more to attend the Phish festival over Halloween weekend.

Three days later, Adam and Maggie visit.

A week later, Molly visits.

Is this really my life? Is there or is there not a vast piece of land between San Francisco and Burlington? I chuckle now at the fact that I wept and cried at leaving Vermont, thinking life would never be the same. Of course, it won't ever be like it was, but who would have thought I'd be able to see these people as frequently as I do? How did I get so blessed to be able to move 3,000 miles away and see most, if not all of my closest friends - some of them even multiple times!

Thank god.

On another note, my time in the Bay Area is rapidly dwindling. I don't think I've truly allowed myself to think about the fact that home will never really be home again. Never again will my parents live on the same street, my brother and I be home for anything other than holidays, my dog be readily available by my side like the loyal and wonderful companion he is. I feel that I have so much to do and so little time to do it in before I leave for who knows how long? As thrilled and excited as I am for New York, I think my goodbyes at the end of December will be as emotionally loaded as they were when I first left for college. I know that time heals everything, and eventually, like it was in Vermont, living in New York will be such a norm that I won't really get homesick. It's just now, while I am unsure of what New York will look like for me, that I'm fully aware of my surroundings and what won't be accessible for me anymore. I wish I could have more time to watch Sammy get smarter and bigger, to be there for Cody through his old age, to help my mom with what will be a tedious and emotional process next spring, and to just always have access to the things and people and places I love here.

I can feel the lump in my throat starting to bulge when I think about all this, but I let it subside. That last day, that day I hop on the plane with my belongings and wave goodbye, will be the time to feel bittersweet and nostalgic and emotional and excited. For now, I still have two months and I plan to damn well enjoy this beautiful Bay Area.